staff retreat

we had staff retreat the first full week of July up in lake arrowhead. we did different things like went to a lake for a day(wake boarding, water skiing), high ropes coarse, paint ball, devotions and praise together, and other things but the thing that was the most challenging and the best part of the retreat was tuesday night to thursday morning.

devotional and praise

Rick and Mary's house
(where we stayed camping outside)

high ropes coarse -
holding Maggi down while she balays (french word)

the staff & Rick and Mary

From tuesday night at 930 to thursday morning 715ish we had a fast from food. only drank water and juice. but in addition of the time of not eating on wednesday we had a time of silence from 8am until 215pm and it was really hard for me at first and to be honest i wasn't looking forward to it but i had to go out anyway and ooh and earlier in the week on monday i was just really struggling i had never conscientiously heard God's voice before and i was stuck, stagnate and i hated it. i didn't really know what to do and so i sat off this road by myself starring at mountain peaks, city lights in valleys below sunsetting on the peaks, moon rising at the same time and i was just crying to God asking and pleading to hear his voice for direction i wasn't sure what to do. and i began singing songs like i miss you, i could run away, etc. then laura and hayley came up and i talked to them so all of this happening still in my head/heart on wed when we were silent and we had different "stages" of our silence. first we had to go through our life and ask God how and why he worked in our lives the way he did,but before i could even do that i was just again pleading to God to hear his voice. i yearned so badly to hear his voice. then i realized that i was fighting with myself, the voices in my head. so again just asking God speak to me then the voice came in and said you are. i was like no no i don't want to hear my voice i want to hear yours and then i heard again no you are. it was soo crazy but just to be in God's presence utterly silent just completely broken and humbled, to finally just hear his voice, or finally let him in i should say and listen. then next, in our day of silence we moved on to gifts and we had to think about what we were good at, what we enjoyed and how God has/had used those. then we had to say ask God what we needed to say yes to and what we needed to say no to and that was crazy too just to hear God's voice through out this whole thing right away i knew it was pride, reputation(what everyone held me to), fear(to be bold for him), and ultimately myself. then my yes was, it was crazy this wording came into my head from God, say yes to living a life recklessly for God. no more of me just where ever he'll send me I WILL GO, doing what ever it takes to get me there I WILL DO IT, no longer i, no fear, just recklessly going after God and his plan. then we went through scripture (crazy I love God's word) and i came across colossians 3:5-10 which is all that God was telling me to say no to. then lastly our final statement which mine ended up being the reckless life for christ. but that time it was awesome nothing i've ever experienced before and i loved it and i want to do it again just being silent to listen to my Father and what he has for my life and the direction.