Enough

The sun rises for a new morning. She rises for yet another Sunday morning and all that it holds. The weekly routine sets in; get ready, breakfast, church. She walks in and sits into the back as the pastor adresses the congregation greeting them. He prays opening the service. She stares at the floor and acknowledges the shuffling feet of the praise band walking up to their instruments. He ends the prayer and the songs begin. They begin with a classic praise song one she has sang a million times, and continues to sing without a second thought. During the message her thoughts are just as scattered. She flips through her Bible looking at different passages searching from something but unable to find it. The messages ends, it is communion Sunday. The pastor prays and a song begins as the elders pass out the pieces of bread. A voice in her head whispers, "How free are you? Kneel and praise Me."

She is reminded of something someone said to her once, "We have perfect freedom in Christ and here in the United States we are not confronted with persecution yet on Sunday morning when you hear kneel and praise Me, lift your hands high and exalt My name...we are paralyzed. What will the person behind me think or will the guy standing next to me give me a weird look? How free are you?"

The song ends and the pastor read from Matthew 26, "While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying, "Take and eat; this is my body." She ate. The next song began for the juice to be past and again, "How free are you? Kneel and praise Me. " She sat down on her chair thinking surely this would be enough. "Are you not free? Some who praise Me will and have been persecuted for this and you only sit because you are worried of someone's opinion? Are you not free?" She fell to the floor ashamed. The pastor finished reading out of Matthew 26. The praise band led the congregation into another song. Another song she had sang several times before but this time it came alive because she was broken and humbled.

crazy?

I was talking to my friend, she was asking me how things are going. I began to reply with some of the different things I'm thinking through, "schools-which is the best choice, where to go on the field, how to make the best choices to get there, to be faithful here and now (tomorrow is no guarantee), etc." Then I began to explain how God is working in me, "insane when you actually are yearning for Him to change you, you're broken, and open to Him molding you what He'll do. And then to keep your eyes open to see those things. Every day, by the time it is coming to an end, I am more and more in awe and in love with God. something that has been one of those things, is forgiveness. God gave me another glimpse of it last week and I was/am blown away." then I was intending to end with "it's crazy" ... but I couldn't do it because these thoughts ran through my mind:

I started to say it's crazy...but it's not because why should we be shocked by the fact that God fulfills His promises, is Faithful, etc. when He said/says He will be? because if we believe the Bible and all it says then when He says, "I will never leave you nor forsake you" why are we shocked when He's always there? Or that He is a provider, protector, faithful, powerful, worthy and then when we see those characteristics why are we surprised? so it's not crazy, it's God. Glory to God!

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I remember in small group when some one will ask, "favorite attributes of God? or ones that mean the most to you right now." I would spout out answers trying to think of all the different ones but saying them with knowledge not heart. But last night one attribute dawned on me. συγχώρεση -forgiveness

Last night my mind got another glimpse of its meaning. How did Jesus bare all my sins that day on the cross and still in knowing them chooses to love me? to use me? Dictionary.com defines forgive as:

1.	to grant pardon for or remission of (an offense, debt, etc.); absolve.

...........-absolve: to set free or release, as from some duty, obligation, or responsibility

2.	to give up all claim on account of; remit (a debt, obligation, etc.).

..........-remit: to refrain from inflicting or enforcing, as a punishment, sentence, etc.

To set free:
Therefore you are no longer a slave, but a son; and if a son, then an heir through God.-Galatians 4:7 (NAS)

He sets me free from the bondage of sin and then calls me a son (daughter)? ... I am undeserving with all my sin but Jesus made an end of all my sin(Before the Throne Above) then beyond that gives me rights to be His heir...His daughter. And then why is it so often I give power to evil. I sit in unnecessary bondage. I am not a slave. I need to embrace His forgiveness and forget. move on for sin has lost it's power (Marvelous Light)

Forgive and Forget:
I, even I, am the one who wipes out your transgressions for My own sake, And I will not remember your sins. -Isaiah 43:25
...for I will forgive their iniquity, and their sin I will remember no more. - Jeremiah 31:34
For I will be merciful to their iniquities, and I will remember their sins no more. - Hebrews 8:12

That's another thing if I am not bound to sin why dwell? God has forgiven and forgotten. God (love) keeps no record of wrongs. [1 Cor. 13:5]


Now that I think about what I just wrote I don't know if it makes sense all together but...basically I got another glimpse and still I am baffled and I can't fathom it but I am immensely thankful. And in thinking about all of this it just makes even more sense (if I ever needed more then a command) that I go.


Up from the grave He rose again!
And as He stands in victory,
Sin's curse has lost its grip on me;
For I am His and He is mine—
Bought with the precious blood of Christ.

No guilt in life, no fear in death—
This is the pow'r of Christ in me;
From life's first cry to final breath,
Jesus commands my destiny.
No pow'r of hell, no scheme of man,
Can ever pluck me from His hand;
Till He returns or calls me home—
Here in the pow'r of Christ I'll stand.
_In Christ Alone

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